Seeds of the heart

 

Recently I was out enjoying the beautiful day and ran across a dead tree. What caught my eye was not only the tree, but also the cottonwood seeds being blown by the wind. Together with the dead tree in the background, it created a beautiful picture of life and death. The tree representing death and the seeds representing birth or new life. I imagined that this tree was once magnificent strong and beautiful amidst the other trees in the forest. Even though it had long-since died, it did not stop new life from happening every day. The seeds were being blown all over the forest to grow and become trees themselves. This tree was now merely a backdrop to the demonstration of life and death.

Stop for a second and imagine Jesus hanging on an old dead tree, noticing all the people watching him die. Like the seeds and the tree, He knew that life was not stopping even though His was at that moment. That His death would be the beginning for new life. Jesus could see both life and death in the same moment! In the crowd that day stood John, His disciple, and he knew that through John the seeds of life would be planted in men and women’s hearts everywhere. That after His resurrection all of His disciples would plant seeds of life in people’s hearts. A dead tree would be a catalyst for new life!

Often we go about our day, living our lives, missing opportunities to be seed planters. People we see everyday are like that dead tree, all around them life is happening but they feel dead inside. Yet we get so caught up with ourselves we can’t see past our own noses. We were made to plant seeds of hope in the hearts of others! Don’t waste what Jesus did for you on that dead tree!

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John 19:25-27

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John 19

Of hidden pacifiers and treasure

Panic ensues at my house whenever we have lost the much coveted Pacifier. We affectionately call it the Passey and it holds a special place in the heart of my son Caden. This Passey is worth more than gold at my house because it ensures that we will have a peaceful night of sleeping or that a nap will not be a battle. We, as parents, know all to well the battle that will be waged when the infamous “Passey” has gone missing. We have probably spent a small fortune on Pacifiers over the last 5 years. I could have put my kids through college or bought an awesome moon rock, but what do we have to show for it? One measly Pacifier.

There have to be literally hundreds of pacifiers somewhere in our house! They almost seem to disappear into thin air. It’s like there is a Pacifier monster in our house or this really old man that lives under the floor boards who has an insatiable appetite for collecting Pacifiers. Our other theory is that my son deliberately hides them, then stages a fit just to see his parents panic. We believe that he and his siblings have a pool going to see which parent finds the Pacifier first and how long it takes us. Small wagers of fruit snacks, assorted lolly pops, fruit loops, found barbie heads, week-old fermented Sippy cup that has been recently found next to the mysterious odor (dirty diaper) hidden underneath the back corner of the couch. My wife and I swear that this is happening. We will turn the house inside out looking for one, and sometimes the back yard, as well. And how sweet the sight of that Pacifier when it is found!

In our family, we look desperately for a Pacifier in order to help us bring peace to our house. We leave no rock unturned and when it is found we celebrate and do whatever we can to make sure we do not lose it again. We find something that has value and we keep it safe so that it can never be taken away from us.

“The kingdom of heaven is like treasure hidden in a field. When a man found it, he hid it again, and then in his joy went and sold all he had and bought that field.” (Matt. 13:44)

You may think that searching for a Pacifier is silly, and I would agree. The problem is that we all have something we are constantly searching for in order to bring us peace, to quiet our lives. Most of us have found this in Christ Jesus, yet we do not consider it of much worth, we have forgotten the treasure that we found years ago. Remind yourself of where your treasure lies.

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Matt 13:44-46

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Matt. 13

 

Aint skeered

My daughter and my oldest son laid with me under the stars a few nights ago. We do this on occasion and it has become a favorite pastime. As we were gazing into the sky, looking for satellites and shooting stars, I asked them to be quiet for a while and listen to the sounds of the night. They did for a minute until they started getting the heeby-geebies. I assured them that there was nothing to fear and that daddy would not let anything harm them. This did not give them any peace and they both insisted that there was most assuredly a pack of wolves waiting outside the fence.

Since their father the protector was not going to be able to save them, and my son kept making scary howling noises (which were also scaring him), I figured we were nearing the end of our star gazing. Then, without prompting, my daughter spoke. With her most assertive voice she uttered, “Colton, we have nothing to fear because Jesus will protect us, we have nothing to be afraid of.” I laid there somewhat dumbfounded, because in this little voice truth rang out, and it spoke directly to me.

Standing on a hillside a giant of a man mocked the armies of the Lord, daring them to come and fight him. He did this day in and day out, and everyone cowered in fear. It wasn’t until a shepherd boy came, and upon hearing the slandering of this giant, decided to do something about it. He faced the giant with a sling and some rocks, and when the giant hurled insults at him this is what he said in reply: “You come against me with sword and spear and javelin, but I come against you in the name of the Lord Almighty, the God of the armies of Israel, whom you have defied.This day the Lord will deliver you into my hands, and I’ll strike you down and cut off your head.” To make a long story short, he kills the giant and eventually becomes the king of Israel.

Too often, I find that I am like the soldiers who were hiding–afraid to face the giant or a pack of wolves that is just outside my door. I put on a show as if it is wisdom that prevents me from facing them, not fear. For me the best thing to do is to merely let the fear go away, or pretend it is not there yelling at me! I try to convince myself, but I know the truth–I’m afraid. Fear is debilitating,crippling ,and leaves me unsure of myself. Jesus, on the other hand, fills my heart with courage and confidence. I become fearless because I know that I am not facing my fears alone. When we know Jesus, we have nothing to fear, it just takes a little girl or a shepherd boy to remind us.

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1 Samuel 17:41-47

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1 Samuel 17 (David and Goliath)

That far away feeling

How long, Lord? Will you forget me forever?
    How long will you hide your face from me?
2 How long must I wrestle with my thoughts
    and day after day have sorrow in my heart?
    How long will my enemy triumph over me?

3 Look on me and answer, Lord my God.
    Give light to my eyes, or I will sleep in death,
4 and my enemy will say, “I have overcome him,”
    and my foes will rejoice when I fall.

5 But I trust in your unfailing love;
    my heart rejoices in your salvation.
6 I will sing the Lord’s praise,
    for he has been good to me.

Psalm 13

“I want God with all the power of my soul — and yet between us there is terrible separation.” Mother Teresa

 

Hey God, Yoohoo over here! Just sitting here reading your Good Book hoping to have an experience with you. Listen, I don’t know what I did, but I am sensing some distance between you and me. No, I mean, it is definitely me, I  mean, I must have done something wrong? Honestly, God, I’ve been picking up on this for the last several months. Maybe you had someplace to go and needed to take some time off? Maybe I smell funny, or maybe I upset ya? But, listen, I am ready to get that feeling back–you have had your little siesta and now I am ready to feel ya again.

Give me a break! I mean, I am sitting down every morning and picking up your Word. I am telling others about you, I even told a squirrel just to make sure I was covering all of my bases. Still, it feels like a wall has been put up. Maybe you and old HS and JC are up there grabbing a latte or playing a game of squash? Seriously, though, you come out the winner regardless! Well, I will just wait down here patiently and continue to pursue You. I look forward to the time when I can feel you again! Between You and me God, I rather enjoy the joy of your presence thing–just sayin’. It always gives me the warm fuzzies. Like little Eskimos running up and down my spine! Know this, God, even if I don’t ever feel you again, I will continue to run after You! I guess it has always been a relentless pursuit. On both of our parts!

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Hebrews 12:1-2

Mercy for You

Last year, my wife suffered from a mental break that is called Post Partum Psychosis. This came on suddenly after the birth of our 4th child, Asher, who came two months early. There was nothing that anyone could have done to prevent it and absolutely nothing that my wife could have done to stop it. Because of this, we fought desperately to hold our family together. Sleepless nights, NICU visits, severe depression, extreme mania, hospital stays, anger, frustration, disappointment, anxiety, nervous breakdowns, lack of confidence, strange dreams, hopelessness… the list goes on.

For both Amanda and I, it has been the darkest days of our lives up to this point. There is much more, and countless amazing stories of God’s grace, miracles and all the help we received. We look forward to sharing all this in a book we are writing, with the hope of encouraging others. Over the course of the year, Amanda and I have changed drastically; we are different people. This has required us to learn about each other all over. After almost 8 years of marriage, we have to sit down and discover each other again. Learning to accept that something is changing and that you can’t control it is hard. To realize that someone you love desperately needs more than just your love, but mercy also, is difficult. Mercy has been the hardest to continually give and every day we must decide to show mercy to each other. If mercy is not a part of our healing process, then we will not overcome, we will not get better. Much like the story Jesus shares about the good Samaritan.

Jesus tells of a Jewish man stranded on the side of the road, beaten by thieves and left for dead. Two men, a Priest and a Levite (both Jewish), come across this man and did nothing to help him; they walked on by. It was a Samaritan, who the Jews thought of as second-class citizens, that came along and helped nurse the man back to health. The Samaritan went above and beyond his duty and cared for a man that he knew despised him. Not because this man deserved his help, but because he needed his help. At the end of this story, Jesus asks, “Which of these three men [in the story] do you think was a neighbor to the man who fell into the hands of robbers?”  The expert answers, “The one who showed mercy on him.” Jesus replied, “Go and do the same.”

Mercy is loving someone even when they don’t deserve it. Mercy is caring for someone because they can’t. Mercy is bandaging an enemy’s broken body. Mercy is being a neighbor to someone. Mercy is caring for each other through difficult times. Mercy is Christ! Now, go and do the same!

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Luke 10:25-37

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Luke 10

 

I Didn’t Start the Fire

I love all of the sights and sounds of spring. It is definitely one of my favorite times of year. Growing up in the Midwest, every spring brought the burning of grass. Grass is burned to remove the old dead brown grass and allow new green grass to grow. There is danger in burning grass, as it can quickly get out of control. Yet there is excitement in that danger–the thrill of something uncontrollable! Whenever a grass fire is out of control and it is burning acre upon acre you quickly understand how beautifully dangerous grass fires can be. Every time I smell burning grass it brings back memories and makes me think of something new, fresh, dangerous.

When Jesus enters into your life, you are a lot like the grass that is burned. He enters your heart and quickly burns away the old person you once were. He replaces your old heart and gives you a new one. He removes all the baggage that you were carrying around with you and lightens your load. He says that you are a new creation; the old is gone and the new has come. He does this because clinging to the old parts of yourself does not allow you to grow. He has to burn away the old parts of who you were so that you can grow into the person that you are supposed to be.

It is always so refreshing to me to see someone who is experiencing the newness of Christ in their life. They are wild, untamed, and beautifully dangerous. Just like the fire, they are burning out of control. They want the whole world to know that they have a relationship with Jesus. They are refreshing to be around, they look different, act different, they are on fire. Then something happens as we grow into “mature” believers–the fire that was once so unstoppable suddenly becomes “controlled.” The winds of passion are not blowing and we are careful and cautious in our relationship with Jesus. We do not want to “burn” anyone with Jesus so we conceal that light under a bush and go around hiding the fire that was at one time burning so brightly. We become more worried about offending someone than helping them catch fire also.

Start embracing the beautiful, dangerous fire of Jesus and allow the Holy Spirit to reignite what has been smoldering inside of you. There are people in front of your eyes that long to be set ablaze by the love of Jesus! Release control, because this fire cannot be controlled, and no one can ever extinguish it.

 

Real Talk

I’ve been convicted of this lately. This post comes from a place of vulnerability, as I feel I have been “hiding” Jesus under a bushel. Not intentionally, but under the mantle of “being controlled” which in my mind translates into fear. I have forgotten what boldness with Christ looks like, what being unashamed of the Gospel means.

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2 Corinthians 5:17

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2 Corinthians 6

 

Grandpa

My Grandfather is a man that I grew up admiring. Although he is shorter than me, he is a giant of a man in my mind. He has always been the perfect example of patience and understanding. He has a way with babies—he is literally the baby whisperer! He has always believed in every one of his children and grandchildren. As he has gotten older, he has lost much of what he used to be. His mind is not what it was, and it has left him incapable of performing tasks that he has always done before. Time has taken its toll, and it is hard to watch.

Five years ago, when he was still able to comprehend and communicate, I flat-out asked when he received Christ as his Savior. I had always assumed that he had done so, but had never asked. I wanted to know because this was the last part of his legacy that I wanted to be most sure of. He got very quiet and began to tell of the moment Jesus came into his heart. He told me how his pastor had looked at him and said, “Don, you want Jesus?” My grandfather said that right then and there he accepted Christ! It was incredible to hear, and a very sincere moment that I will never forget.

My prayer is that my love of Jesus is ever on my lips. My grandfather is a great man and I deeply admire him, but I had to ask him about God because his faith was not obvious to me. No matter how great a person you are, it means little if the world doesn’t know who gets all the glory. May

I want to give people reasons to ask, to want to know what it is that makes me different. May I boldly give the reasons for my hope and answer questions before they are ever asked.

Real talk
One would think I would have no problem with this because of my work in ministry. Yet I find myself sometimes hiding the fact that I love Jesus. I use sarcasm to sidestep the question of what makes me different. Why? Because it is easier to not ruffle feathers. O perhaps I am uncomfortable, or worse, afraid. For me it is a constant prayer for boldness and courage, it is an everyday choice. The more I fall in love with Jesus the easier it gets.

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Matt 5:15

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Matt 5

First steps

For the last several months, I have asked for God to help me to take the first step, to help me see a need and to respond by meeting that need. My prayer is for God to give me His eyes and His ears as I go out into the world each day. I really want to follow through when I feel prompted by Him to do something. This means there is a chance that I may encounter opportunities to reach out on God’s behalf, and that can be uncomfortable.

I found myself in one of these situations one day when I went to the park for a quick run. As I arrived, I observed a gentleman sitting alone, and he just so happened to be directly in my view when I returned from my run to my car. I felt God was prompting me to take that first step, but instead I tried to think of any reason why I had no time to talk to this man. You know you’ll never win an arguments with God!

Finally, I muttered, “Ok, I am going,” and reluctantly went to talk with this man. As I talked to him I learned about his terrible relationship with his family, a snake that recently bit him (true story—his foot was swollen), but most importantly, how broken his life was! All I offered him was a friendly ear and sympathy. For a short time I was able to care for this man–not change his life, but just love him where he was. I was able to be Jesus with skin on. I would have missed out on that had I stayed in my car, had I not taken that first step.

When we think of the story of Peter walked on water we all think about his lack of faith and him sinking into the waves. What we sometimes overlook is that Peter was the only one to get out of the boat, and he got out of the boat only after Jesus told him to come. The lesson I have learned is that when Jesus tells us to take that first step, we should do it. We might sink, but we might walk on water. Sometimes you may feel full of faith, and other times you may need Jesus to reach out and grab your hand. Either way, it is time to stop being afraid and take the first step out of the boat or car!

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Matt 14:28-29

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Matt 14